Aquatic Tradgedy / V. Gay (A Two Part Adventure)
12:03 p.m. :: 2007-02-25
I love my fish. My two lovely little goldfish. One of them (the littlest one, Julio) has been suffering from cloudy eye and despite improving the water quality he still has it, so I decided yesterday to quarantine him in a smaller tank and give him some treatment. I left Ernest in the bigger tank but the new filter I'd bought was too big so the lid couldn't go on. Ernest was LOVING the new filter, the bubbles it created were a major source of amusement to him! All was fine and dandy, Julio was pretty depressed but I would be if I'd been relegated to small tank living!
I got in last night at around 1.30am, put my oinion bhaji in the microwave and looked into the bigger tank. I sensed something wasn't right... Ernest was on the floor. I picked him up and put him back in the tank. He sank to the bottom, his gills hardly moving. I gently nudged him and he tried so hard to swim but then he just sank back down, dispondant, giving up. I was horrified, I called The Boyfriend immediately in a flood of tears. I felt like I'd killed him, like it was all my fault, why didn't I put the lid on? OK so it didn't fit properly but would've stopped this happening. The fact that he was still just alive freaked me even more - can you really just leave something you love in pain?
I covered the tank with a table cloth, too gutted to want to look anymore, and the last thing I wanted was for little Julio to see his mate, his brother dying. When I looked again about 10mins later Ernest had picked up, he was swimming a bit more and things were actually looking positive. With a more positive attitude I went to bed. I even prayed for him (to who's God I don't know - I don't have one). This morning he is very weak, I don't know how long he was out of the water for but his upper fin has slightly eroded and his mouth and gill movements are rapid and erratic, as are his swimming techniques. I spoke to a guy in an aquarium and he says there is nothing I can do but wait. It's so sad that I can't put the two together, they'd be so much happier - they haven't been apart for 3 years. Please join me in crossing all your fingers and toes and wishing/praying with all yur heart that my little Ernest gets better. It's breaking my heart to see him like this.
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My night out was pretty dire. Nikki the Lesbian's� hat birthday party in gay bars, avec gay music and snooty little fucking queen bar staff who over charge me becuase they can't handle the fact that I am ever more fabulous than they will EVER be!! Especially in my hat. Grrrr. Had some foxy 30 something lesbian trying to get fresh with me all night, which at first was fun but by the end of it quite odd. We danced for a while, she ended up grinding on me so I politely made my excuses and she spent the rest of the night cautiously eyeing me and occasionally trying to kiss me. Very odd, she knew I was straight and that I am madly in love with The Most Amazing Man Alive (fact). Maybe the universal meaning for no is yes and I just missed the memo.
Despite me being madly in love with The Most Amazing Man Alive (fact) I still called up Work Guy last night after we had exchanged a few text messages. We agreed that today he would pop over, we'd smoke a couple of spliffs then head out to see Hot Fuzz at the cinema. Erm no. When I stare sobriety in the face the next morning, the need for attention from men other than my man drifts off. Anyways, it turns out I have double booked - I agreed to go to lunch with Nikki the Lesbian� and friends. I'm not sure if I can be arsed.
Watch this space... and please lend your thoughts to little Ernest.
tto xx